They say there is power in calling out one's name, like casting out a demon from a possessed person, or invoking a Spirit. And there's something malignant in doing so, to say the least. So I won't do it, because it is clear you still wish to remain out of my life. Changing veils and masquerading through different societies and peoples. Tonight's a particularly windy night, and I hear the Wind howl. In most ways, the Wind is as alive as we are, or maybe just me since I have no clue if you are still alive or dead. You said goodbye midsummer in 2010 after many months of knowing me, bewitching my heart out of its cage and then leaving . Eight years after the fact, and I'm still wondering if this is the part where I, too, walk away for good and accept the fact that I will never hear from you again. Should I stay or should I go? What if I'm the story God chose to write about bearing me as the faithful and loyal lover who awaits her beloved? What if this is where I walk away and carry on as if nothing supernatural happened during our magical companionship? Who knows, but I'm still at the crossroad waiting for a sign or for our stars to cross again.
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You had been living in Jerusalem for two years when we first began to talk, but have no way of knowing if you're still there or came back to the US. You spiritually changed me for the better. Thank you for being the right kind of messenger, and for lending an ear. I know you're on your journey with your spiritual work and if there's any place in the world best suited for that, it would be Jerusalem.
I want to close this book, or transform the kind of companionship we had to a more spiritual one. For every time I've attempted to move-on, your memory comes back in full force as if the winds carry your message. They say, "Do you remember?". I hope one day I find you, so that I can thank you and we can say goodbye for good.
- 24 in 2010
- had 2 siblings (a brother and a sister)
- half dutch
- a Virgo
- named after an animal
- we met on a now dead social media (of sorts) platform
- lived in Jerusalem
- Psalm 104
Message me if you want, my friend. I hope to hear from you!